Search and spread sustained happiness

Silence

2007-07-13T11:46:00.000+05:30

My good friend and rakhi-brother, Akhil, made me aware of the concept of Silence and its importance during one of our long discussions on spiritual learnings.

I was sitting in our prayer room at home this morning when the concept of silence came to me. My father-in-law was reading Guru Granth Sahib with his back towards the window which opened up to a beautiful blue post -rain clear sky. There was no sound in the room. Only a nice cool beeze was flowing from the window with which my father-in-laws white beard was moving. The room itself contained the aura of Guru Granth Sahib and lots of prayer that has been done inside it. It was as silent as it could get.

And yet. Yet, yet, yet. Because I was getting late for office, my mind had a hundred thoughts, things to do list running through it. I was sitting in that heavenly room and I didnot feel silence, How ironic :)

When Guru Gobind Singh Ji visited Paonta Sahib (now in Himachal Pradesh, India), River Yamuna used to make a lot of noise in that area. But on a stone in the middle of the river, where he sat and created a Bani (Chaupai Sahib), the river is absolutely silent.

Expectation of perfection

2007-07-12T16:04:00.000+05:30

Have you ever wondered that most people expect the world be perfect as per their liking, but dont like it when the world expects perfection from them?

A young boy expects his mom not to trouble him when he is watching TV (because a perfect world according to him consist of uninterrupted-tv-no-nagging-from-mom), but doesn't like to conform when his mom expects him to make his own bed. A wife expects her husband to cook, but doesnt like it when the husband expects the same from her! A boss wants his junior to do honest work , but doesn't like it when the poor junior wants an honest feedback!

Why do we expect the world to be in a certain way, when we do not like the 'burden' of expectation. Well then, we must understand that the person or system from whom we expect also feels burdened. There seem to be two "solutions" to this : Free the world from your expectations (difficult), or, having a softer approach to administering your expectation. It is important to give everybody from a child to a parent the feeling of being free and independant. If you hammer your expectation into somebody, he/she will most likely react. Therefore an alternavtive is to explain the reason for your expectation in a open, (depending on the situation) loving manner and have a discussion about the other person's comfort/ apprehensions about it. Then you negotiate the levels! As a mother your ideal world would be one where your kid makes the bed everyday.. start by letting your child do it once a wekk, then twice then thrice. You will see great results.

Imagine, if instead of getting a dump down from your boss"this is what I expect you to do by this day, bye bye", you hear "here is what we were planning to achieve, here is how we were thinking we should do it, sounds good?" Sounds great, doesn;t it? To me it does.

Another dimension : I have noticed several times that people manage to find a fault in some of these things or everything : mom, dad, brother, friends, education, boss, infrastructure, job, husband, wife, kids, school, sunlight, rain, winter- woah! :)
I must admit that I belong to the fault-finder community. It pinches me several times, because finding faults makes me unhappy and dissatisfied. But yet, I continue to have this expectation of 'perfection'.. it keeps me longing for a better (rather, perfect) world..

But then I wonder, am I perfect? My mom certainly doesn't think so ;) Kidding, I'm sure I'm not. Deep down inside everybody knows that they are not perfect. And the aspects of you which are not perfect are opportunities for the activation of fault-finding hormones in another human being.

A lot of time and energy gets absorbed in finding faults and discussing them. I great way to use this energy is to do something positive to attempt to change the fault. Write to the traffic police if you are having serious traffic problems, discuss (politely) with your relatives and friends if you have a problem with them, speak to your boss. I am sure after you have done this, you will feel much better. and feel a lesser urge to brood over the fault. Of course there will be some faulty things that you can do nothing about. Then well, leave them as they are. They must have been placed by the Creator with some intention :0)

Being Non Aggressive

2007-07-04T09:37:00.000+05:30

I am deeply thankfully to the writer of this page http://www.sikhawareness.com/sikhawareness/viewtopic.php?t=9536&sid=2c5e73cab49b40a776d79a70e27fb873#bot

Today's post has been inspired from a line in the Foreword to Sundari written by Guru de pyare, Bhai Sahib Bhai Vir Singh ji. Sundari was the first novel penned by Bhai Vir Singh ji's kalam in 1868, when he was all but 16 years old. My mother gave me an English version of this novel to read when I was in school. I remember tears flowling helplessly from my eyes when I read it then, and the same thing happened today when I read an extract of Sundari from the above page.

The line which inspires today's thought "The Khalsa represents spiritually elevated people who are blissfully cheerful, fearless, invincible but non-aggressive"

Now imagine -feeling invincible, yet non-aggressive. It felt as if some peace had dawned on me when I read this line.

While growing up these days, we pass through layers of competitive feelings - "I must do better than others" " I must beat that guy" "I must be ahead".. Basically, "I need to be invincible". And when we accomplish something, anything - it could be a medal, a great score, a brownie point - we feel encouraged, more confident, and more aggressive. Now, aggression is perceived to be a propeller- but it is also an emotion that can mislead action.

Aggression starts from being convinced about your idea or ability, and generally translates into an attempt to convince others about it with all your might. Continued aggressive thinking over the years implies that one is pumping more energy, pumping the heart harder, producing more adrenaline- all without much reason! Because in being aggressive, in wanting to come first 'over' somebody else - you entering into a the trap of comparison. And believe me, there is no finish line the race of comparison. No matter where you reach, you will keep seeing that somebody has 'more' than you. A student who gets into IIT will wonder how lucky the Standard graduates are (although it is much tougher to get into IIT than to get into Standford!).

Aggression, dissatisfaction and unhappiness- all have a link.

Now imagine how beautiful would it be if you could have the feeling of being invincible and yet be non-aggressive. So you're assured from within about your abilities, your purpose- but aggression doesn't touch you!

But how can this happen ? How can you become "blissfully cheerful, fearless, invincible but non-aggressive"? That can happen only when you begin your day with a sweet prayer, asking the Lord to bless you with hard work; and end your day with another prayer - offering all your work and success to him. Only He gives you the strength, so all that you work belongs to Him. You will feel cheerful because you are not going to sleep with any sort of 'burden' of success, you will feel fearless because the Lord is guarding your hard work and you will feel non-aggressive because the Guru will , over the days, give you the ammunition of love and peace to "fight" competition. That's what saint-warriors are all about.

So the message for today is silent, humble, love-filled success can give infinitely more happiness (Bliss actually) than aggressive, noisy success :)

It will be really nice if you could take some time to read the page that I picked up Bhai Vir Singh Ji's line from http://www.sikhawareness.com/sikhawareness/viewtopic.php?t=9536&sid=2c5e73cab49b40a776d79a70e27fb873#bot

May the Guru give me strength and determination to write consistently. It really helps me clear up my own thoughts. I am already two posts behind! :)

Lots of love and cheer
Supreet

The Beginning

2007-06-12T15:16:00.000+05:30

Hi, welcome to Gurmukh Soch. Let me explain why I chose this url. When I say Gurmukh, I mean any perosn (not necessarily GurSikh), whose mukh (or face or man-bhavna) is towards the Guru. I am eager to interact, exchange views and understand the soch of such people.
Overall there are 2 objectives that I set out for myself , to achieve through my blog.

First, is to spread the message of the great saint-poet Bhai Sahib Bhai Vir Singh ji, among the youth. I recently visited Bhai Vir Singh Sahitya Sadan on the occasion of his 50th death anniversary. (read a wikipedia extract on Bhai Vir Singh ji http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bhai_Vir_Singh)

What struck me as odd was the conspicuous absence of young people. If young people do not relate to Bhai Vir Singh, I fear that his work may fade in the coming decades. Then, a simple message that I had read somewhere came back to me " If you are unhappy with a situation , either you should do whatever is possible in your strength to change it, or, you should extract out the situation." In this case, it struck me that if I start a blog that publishes (whatever little to start with) youth-relevant extracts of Bhai Vir Singh Ji's work, I can something little to resolve this unhappy situation.!
This will be a gradual process, it will involve a lot of research into Bhai Sahib ji's work. But I do hope to post something of substance at least once a week.

Second, many times through my life I have experienced unexplainable joy when sitting in sat-sangat. I have been able to feel the purity, the truth and the strength in spiritual words. These are the precious moments where I have felt happiness. I wish to understand; and help many more people also understand how this happiness can be sustained. I wish to understand what aspects people attribute to the strength of their faith, and the strength in their prayer.

So, look forward to blogging! Please feel free to post comments.